Guest Blogger: Tamara Kelly
Hyper-sexualization and porn addiction are two issues that are becoming increasingly prevalent in our society. The hypersexualization of women and children in media and advertising has become so normal that it is often not even noticed or questioned. This has led to a culture where women and children are objectified and sexualized, and their worth is determined by their appearance. This has led to unrealistic expectations of beauty and physical perfection. Porn addiction is another problem that is on the rise. With the explosion of easily accessible online porn, it has become easier than ever to get hooked on explicit content. But, due to the fact, that we have been desensitized to all things explicit, the subtle connection between hyper-sexualization and porn addiction can go overlooked.
Sexual abuse during a person’s developmental years has a strong correlation with hyper-sexuality, sex addiction, and an unhealthy perception of sex, intimacy, and relationships as an adult.
Hyper-sexuality can often be a response to sexual abuse. This is something I only recently realized as I continue to uncover the multiple layers of my addiction to pornography through recovery.
Growing up, dance has always been a part of my life. Just the other day, I recalled times when I was asked to show out-of-town relatives my latest dance moves. The dance(s) I performed consisted of a lot of booty pops, obscene gestures, suggestive grinding, and seductive looks. And when I was done, I was given money for doing a good job. They did not realize that they were encouraging inappropriate behavior; that a child had no business doing these moves.
They were teaching me that:
- Dancing for money was okay.
- Certain gestures can get you attention.
- Being sexy gets you what you want.
I am not blaming my family because they did not know any better at the time. They just thought it was cute that I, a child, could impersonate the dancers so well. This still goes on today. You see children doing the same moves, with their parent’s approval and encouragement, in recitals, videos, competitions, you name it. The parents do not realize that, that cuteness, will turn very ugly later.
My addiction to pornography was just one major response to the sexual and emotional traumas I had experienced throughout my life. Moving through recovery has allowed me to recover me. By recognizing all my unhealthy body image issues and self-esteem issues I have begun to find wholeness.
If you are struggling with these same issues start by being honest with yourself and take steps to address them. And seek professional help for addiction. Whatever it may be. You can live free from addiction.
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Tamara Kelly is the Founder of Private Obsession Recovery Network (P.O.R.N.). The organization that spreads the truth about pornography, addiction, and recovery. In her spare time she continues to teach dance online to children and adults. She is also the author of, “My Journey to Wholeness Through a Time of Reflection” on Amazon.
If you are a woman and you are struggling with an addiction to pornography, check out the Private Obsession Recovery Network on YouTube Channel or Get 30-Days Free with promo code PORNRECOVERY by visiting covenanteyes.sjv.io/EKyPxX.